First School Portrait

I got Henry's first school picture yesterday. I knew the background was going to be the fishing pier so I dressed him in overalls. My preference would have been to put him in a traditional Vietnamese outfit but I didn't think it would match the background. I wasn't at the sitting--they took his shoes off and he seemed to have been crying when they snapped the picture.

A Visit from Granddaddy

My father has been visiting this week from Georgia. He is staying at my grandmother's house and Henry and I spent the weekend there and will go over after I get off work this week. This is the first time they have met each other. You can see that they are both comfortable and happy with each other.

In the meantime I am also getting ready for the social worker to visit next Saturday for my first after adoption report. I have made a few changes in Henry's room. I bought the rack with the bins for toys at Ikea and got the toy chest for larger toys. I like to have a place to put everything away but I like that the rack lets Henry see what is there.

I also got the hanging basket at Ikea (in the corner) to put stuffed animals in. I have the little tv in Henry's room and play Disney videos (everyone is getting rid of videos and getting DVDs) but Henry doesn't seem too interested in watching anything yet. He will watch cartoons on the television in the living room but I'm not sure he is really following any kind of story. He does like to listen to music on the CD player, it helps him go to sleep.

I took Henry to the children's center and then went back home to mow the grass. It is a huge yard, as can be seen. And not all of it is visible--there is still a big area around the barn.

And there is this big area behind the house. I did some mowing on Saturday morning before Henry woke up, and finished the rest today. I guess I will do my main mowing on Tuesday morning since I don't go into work until after lunch. Otherwise I don't really know what to do with Henry unless I get up early in the morning before he wakes up, and often it is too wet from the morning dew to mow that early.

I am not as worried about the social worker's visit as I was when she first came. I thought she was going to do some kind of white glove test and check for hospital cleanliness. There are still some things I have left to do--not all the cabinet doors have child proof locks on them, I don't have covers on the outlets, and not all the power cords are hidden away. I also still have the two bathroom doors left to paint from my remodeling--all the other doors are white but those two are still the natural wood finish.

Both of us are getting over colds

Henry and I both had colds. Maybe it was the sudden change in weather from Texas to Wisconsin. I was a little afraid he was going to be as sick as he had been back around Christmas, but fortunately that has not been the case. He had a routine doctor's appointment last Friday--for a polio vaccine and a second flu shot. He is now caught up with his shots and won't get anymore until his second birthday visit. He is on an anti-biotic for his cough, which seems to plague him at night. I think I will end up taking him to an allergist--he seems to be bothered by a cough mainly when he is lying down. I guess drainage from his nose is going back into his throat and irritating him, causing him to cough. I go to see a doctor tomorrow, I think I might have had a slight case of bronchitis.

I have noticed Henry making faces like the one taken here at the doctor's office. I finally realized he was mimicking me. I scruntch up my face when I put his shoes on or get him dressed, and he is doing the same thing I do. Now I have begun to be more aware of what my face is doing since he is copying me.

It has also been a step forward to realize he knows what I am saying, and will soon be talking to me. Currently he says cat, dog, and daddy. It will be a big change to have somebody around who can actually speak to me.

Another development--my mother has moved to San Antonio to live in a retirement community called The Village at Incarnate Word (http://www.iwretire.org/). She continued to not feel well after we returned from Vietnam and I hope she regains her vigor under their care. This has left Henry and myself on our own at the farm. Luckily Tammy who works with me in the library has stepped in to help me take care of Henry on the one night a week that I work.

I still haven't figured out what I will do with Henry while I am mowing the large yard. I might try putting a playpen in the driveway or I guess I could put him in a backpack. I guess I could buy some fencing and make a small outdoor play area. So much has to be planned out ahead of time. I just bought one of those mini-vacuums that doesn't make much noise so I can clean the floor after Henry is asleep. And of course I still have my dissertation to try and work on during those few hours after he goes to sleep and before I go to sleep.

Overall I think we are both adjusting well to our new life together.

A Snowy Spring Break in Wisconsin

Last week Henry and I left the balmy upper 70 degree Texas weather for a wintery spring break in Wisconsin. He had seen a little bit of snow here, but nothing like what we encountered there. We didn't get out in it much, did not play in it. Maybe he can do that when he is older. We spent all our time indoors with Ben and his parents Joe and Katie.
The boys got along really well. I was able to get ten days off work and they had plenty of time to reacquaint themselves with each other.
I'm not sure what they think of each other. They do seem to know each other. They are not afraid of each other and they will play side by side--though they are more content if toys are not involved. If they have toys then they tend to want what the other one has--sometimes. Other times they will give toys back and forth to one another.

We got to eat out alot. In my rural environs there is not much choice of eating out, we are usually homebodies. Ben is using a spoon to feed himself--with alot of the mess that I dread but know will eventually happen when Henry starts. For now Henry eats with his fingers or I feed him, although he does like to play with a spoon and puts it in his mouth so I guess the time is right to let him try to feed himself.
The boys were never aggressive with each other. They seemed to want to comfort each other when one was upset. Ben espeically liked to feel Henry's hair, which was slightly longer than is own.
One day (the day of the big ten inch snow) we took the boys to a children's museum. Much of it is suited for somewhat older children, but there was a good assortment of things that they could do, like climbing into this truck. Both liked sitting behind the wheel.
Ben and Henry both love cars. I'm not sure how early they developed this. I wouldn't think they would have had much interaction with cars in Vietnam. For some time Henry has made a rumbling sound as he pushes a car along. I was surprised when he first did it, because he had to have learned it from somewhere.
For Easter we went out to a restaurant and then went over to Joe's parents' house. Ben and Henry enjoyed rolling around on the carpet with Joe's nephew Luke.

We went down to Illinois for a photo sitting, wandering around the big mall. We rented matching strollers and had purchased matching outfits for the sitting.
One store had a big fish tank. They both enjoyed looking at the fish. Henry cried when I pulled him away from the tank.
It took alot of work to get them to smile for the photos. It must be easy to get one child to smile and pose nicely. It is difficult when there are two.
Joe and Katie picked out the sporty outfits, I picked out the preppy outfits.
Overall the trip was great. Joe and Katie were so nice to open their home to us for an extended stay, and Joe's family was extremely nice to us. They included Henry in their Easter gift giving festivities. We didn't celebrate that much when I was growing up--I guess that is something I will have to learn about as I raise Henry.

I dreaded the plane ride back, but it was pretty smooth. I packed everything, including my laptop and my video camera, in my checked luggage because I didn't want to have to deal with a big carry-on and Henry. As it turned out all I needed was a couple of bottles--Henry fell asleep not long after the plane took off. I wish I had had my camera out to take his picture when the plane was taking off--his face and mouth were all screwed up as he looked out the window while everything was flashing by so quickly.

Henry was sick a few days ago, ran a fever. But he has been okay for the past three or four days. I was really sick yesterday, didn't think I was going to make it onto the plane. But we made it and I'm back at work today. It was a wonderful spring break.

Getting ready for spring break!

It is dark when we leave home now, since daylight savings time started. Henry likes to watch the outdoor cats eat. They are a lot friendlier than Sugar, my indoor white cat. She hisses if he dares come near her.
I guess Henry will adjust soon to the time change. I have had to wake him up the past few days. The downside of him not waking me up early is that he goes to bed later than usual. It is still daylight at his regular bedtime now--and it will just get moreso as the year wears on.

We are getting ready for our spring break trip to Wisconsin to visit Joe and Katie and Ben. We finally got the photos we had taken in Dallas during their Christmas visit. The boys look so much alike--it's amazing to me that the agency personnel who saw them face to face say they never realized they were related, much less identical twins.

If we had gotten the photos taken fifteen minutes earlier the boys would have been in ideal moods. They were laughing and playing out in the lobby while we waited. By the time we finally got to our turn in the studio they were tired. Joe, Katie and I hooted and jumped up and down and did all we could to elicit laughs, all the while having to remain close enough to catch them because they were perched atop a big box.
Now is such a busy time. I don't even try to eat breakfast at home anymore--I drop Henry off at the campus children's center and get to my office fifteen minutes early and eat there. During my lunch break and on my afternoon off I try to get as much written on my dissertation as I can. I am basically under the gun to produce at least a chapter this semester--even if it's just a rough draft. I will be so glad when I get it out of the way.

Meanwhile there is lots to do in the library. I weeded out a whole lot of the children's books, then went back through them and took over half of them back. Some cage walls surrounding my area are coming down, we are expanding out but this requires lots of shifting of the books and moving of stacks. And that's just my own little curriculum and juvenile & youth area. We are also weeding the upper floors to make room for renovation up there. I am responsible for education, psychology, counseling, and health & human performance.

But while I am busy here in the library Henry is enjoying the socialization over at the children's center (they don't like to call it daycare--it's the Children's Learning Center). Henry was invited to a birthday party in April. It's the first time I will be making friends through Henry rather than taking him to my friends' houses.

Vietnamese Shell Game

Last night as I watched Henry stack and unstack these cups I thought about the current situation in Vietnam. It seems we got out of there just before the new I-600 regulations took effect, and things have been very slow to move since then. I am not sure how the process could be made better--US officials don't seem to like the way some things are done, Vietnamese officals dislike having their process (and I suppose their intergrity) questioned, and adoption agencies and facilitators dislike having cumbersome procedures and paperwork. Meanwhile children are overcrowded in orphanages.

I am not sure where the solution lies. I don't think US officials should take a paternalistic approach to their counterparts in Vietnam, but I do think the integrity of international adoption procedures should be adhered to. I do think corners are cut and problems avoided by agencies and/or facilitators, and this lead to sometimes questionable paperwork for children that are authentically relinquished.

I remember last year there was much discussion in online groups about twin referrals. News of a twin referral was often greeted with skepticism and suspicion. Twin referrals brought greater scrutiny and no doubt made the process more difficult insofar as paperwork is concerned--making sure every i is dotted and every t is crossed. I believe that is why the decision was made (by who I am not sure) to separate Henry from his twin Ben. I just don't think they wanted to endure the added attention and scrutiny that would accompany the referral of identical twins.

Now my heart goes out to those who are waiting, wondering how long the process will draw out and hoping to get finished before the present MOU falls out of effect. I hope that the US and Vietnamese powers that be reach some kind of agreement that allows for both the timely AND ethical adoption of children who need homes.
Meanwhile Henry is further settling in to American life--by learning to love TV Land and the Beverly Hillbillies. I record several episodes a day and we watch them while I feed him and while he plays. He is pretty tired by the time we get home in the early evening but the television seems to be something familiar to him and he enjoys watching it.

Henry's First Snow Day

I thought Henry's first sight of snow would be in a couple of weeks when we go to Wisconsin. But we woke up to a few inches of snow today. Henry didn't seem to know what to think of it--he certainly didn't know that it was cold until he touched it. Since he doesn't really have proper snow gear and we were in a hurry I just had time to briefly introduce him to snow before we were off in the car and cautiously making our way down the road to the polls.
Today was election day in Texas, and the above photo is Henry standing on the porch of the building where the polls are located. I got there at 7 AM when the polls opened to cast my vote. They didn't have the machines working properly and we ended up having to wait an hour and a half. Several other people came and went but I stayed on until the county clerk showed up and finally got everything up and running.

In the meantime Henry ran around the room and entratained the election judges. One man gave him a quarter which he very happily played with (with me watching him like a hawk to make sure he didn't put it in his mouth) until it rolled under the door of a locked closet and was lost.
This photo was taken a few days ago--I picked up this car for Henry to play on outside. It was rather warm that day--hard to believe it was up to 72 a couple of days ago. He really seems to like sitting on it, but hasn't figured out how to make it go forward yet.