Wednesday, October 31, 2007

G&R tomorrow morning

We have to leave the hotel at 5:30 in the morning to get to Binh Duong at 7:30 for the 8 AM Giving and Receiving Ceremony. That is the official recognition by the Vietnamese government that I am Henry's parent. Then in the afternoon we have the mandatory (and no doubt well needed) medical examination. If all goes well I hope to be home with Henry and my mother by the end of next week.
Last night as I was bathing Henry he wailed loudly and two of the staff fromthe hotel poked their heads in to see what was happening. The one pictured here has been particularly helpful both with Henry and also with turning pineapples we buy into fresh juice for my mother.

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

A Message from Henry as told to my Mother

My GranBetty showed my twin brother Ben's web site to me today. I must say I did not realize he had become such a literary genius in such a short period of time, but see for yourself-- http://www.journey4babyben.blogspot.com/ He has been having all kinds of fun adventures since going home to Wisconsin. I really look forward to going home to Texas and beginning my adventures on the ranch where my GranBetty lived as a child and where my Daddy now lives in a house next to my GranBetty. She retired to her childhood home after a career of practicing law in San Antonio. But to more important things...... My daddy really needs lots of OTJ training. He does not have very good skills associated with diaper changes, especially the "big jobs" He may have a lot of University credits, but he does not know much about taking care of little boys. But I am patient with him and am willing to take it slow as he does not catch on very fast. His skills at formula preparation need a lot of improvement. He just discovered a few minutes ago that he was using the wrong size measure to measure the dry powder that is my formula. The can of formula that the orphanage gave to him as it turns out had two measuring spoons. He did not know this at first. Then when he realized it, he was in a panic, not knowing which spoon to use, for he realized this was the reason I had been having such copious bowel movements. But my GranBetty came to the rescue. Confidentially her skills are somewhat rusty and outdated, but I bear with her. She taught me how to play ball yesterday while my Daddy was out getting food. I was very sad and was crying, thinking about leaving my friends and my caretakes at the orphanage. But after about the 4th try of GranBetty rolling to ball to me, I learned to roll and also throw it back. GranBetty really praised me and said I was really learning fast and would probably be a great ball player one day. I don't know about that, but playing with GranBetty took my sadness away and I began to smile and laugh. I am glad I no longer feel sad, but am now happy with my new Daddy and GranBetty and looking forward to returning to Texas.

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Monday, October 29, 2007

Our First Morning

The night went better than expected. Henry ate at 4, 7, and 10. I was expecting him to wake up at 1 given the three hour intervals between feedings. But he slept somewhat fitfully until almost 5 AM. He rolled from one end of the bed to another, twitched and mumbled in his sleep. A few times he whimpered and seemed on the verge of waking but I rubbed his back and he quieted down.

Of course the quiet night had a price--when he woke up this morning there was a big mess on the sheet to clean up as his diaper had leaked out his first bowel movement. I think the diapers are the right size, I'm not sure why the leak happened. Probably I should have changed him in the middle of the night after he pee-ed, but he cries so loudly when his diaper is changed and I was reluctant to cause anymore noise in the hotel. Although I notice that the hotel is not putting anyone in the room next to us again today.
I found out he likes water, but I'm not sure how much to give him. He seems to sweat easily, I guess he acclimated to the hotness of the orphanage. I've also been mixing apple juice with water and he seems to like that.
I think the crying when he sees us is over with. Now he cries when is diaper is change--if you even touch it in a way that seems like you are going to change him he will wail. He also will cry when somebody enters the room. This morning Hoi and Loc came over (they are staying in the hotel next door) and he initially cried but soon he was letting them hold him.
It is great to be able to make him laugh and I hope he feels safe and comfortable, loved and accepted.

The first evening

I understand those signs on doors now that say "Do not ring doorbell, baby asleep." Henry cries loudly whenever a change occurs--if he is passed from one person to another, if somebody leaves the room, etc. I hope he doesn't disturb the people in the room next to us tonight (then again, if they could sleep through our hacking coughs last night it may not pose a problem).

The other two families decided to meet for a late lunch and we had arranged to eat at a restaurant just around the corner from my hotel. I was still leery about taking Henry out, wondering if he would cry the whole time, so I left him with my mother and went out for a quick bite. I was very hungry--all I ate yesterday was a small banana and today I had a baguette for breakfast and that's it. They had their children with them and they were both very quiet and docile.

Then when I got home my mother was playing "ball" with Henry and he was laughing. He was initially disturbed by me entering the room but he quieted down. Thank goodness I brought a CD of lullabies. It really seems to quiet him down. Both of the photos posted here are taken while that CD is playing.

Here he is!

We were picked up by a van and went with the other two families and Loc and Hoi to the orphanage at Binh Duong. Happily things were worked out and we all got our babies.
Henry cried, he didn't like to be transferred from one person to another. He was in a walker when I first saw him and he moved around like a spider, very fast.
It all went in a whirlwind, moreso because Henry cried wheras the other babies were quite docile so I didn't pay much attention to anything else.





Sunday, October 28, 2007

The day is finally here!

It's been a past few days of wondering and deciphering conflicting reports but all now seems to be on schedule for me to be picked up at 9 AM to be taken to the orphanage to pick up Henry.

Yesterday both my mother and I were very sick. We both got sick with allergies in Hoi An and it seemed to get worse in Danang and really bad when we got back here to Saigon. She has lung problems so it affected her more than me. But then I got what I guess might have been food poisoning and was running a high temperature yesterday. We stayed in the room all day trying to get better and thank goodness we feel well enough today.

Loc and Hoi are arriving in a half hour on the night train from Danang and they will be able to accompany us to the orphanage to pick up Henry.

However the other two families that I thought would be picking up their children the same time as me will not be able to do so. They will need your prayers and well wishes as it is very trying and stressful.

Loc and Hoi's Wedding, Day Two

The second day of the wedding was devoted to the traditional Vietnamese practices of matrimony. Loc had already traveled several days ago to Hanoi and went through a similar ceremony with Hoi's family. Today the ceremony was centered around Loc's famly.There are three parts--thanking God, thanking the ancestors, and thanking the parents.
This is the altar in Loc's family's home.
Loc's parents put a ring, a necklace, and a bracelet on Hoi to signifty her acceptance to the family.
Here Loc's younger sister and her husband pose after putting a gold band on Hoi's finger. Loc's brothers similarly put rings on her finger.
After the ceremony we sat out in the patio area for a few minutes visiting with neighbors, and then we made our way to the assembly hall where a baniquet was held in honor of the couple.
Loc and Hoi lit candles on a heart shaped candleabra. Elaborate food was served by waitors whose movement was choreographed. In a part of the evening where Loc and Hoi's parents stood up on the dais and spoke we were also invited as honored guests to stand with th family.
Folllowing this various guests stood up and sang songs karaoke style as Loc and Hoi made their way from table to table to pose for photos.
The next morning we all went out to eat a hearty breakfast--beef steak and eggs.
While my mother rested Loc and Hoi took me and Hoi's father and uncle to Marble Mountain.
We observed various statues that were sculpted from the marble. We also climbed to the first cave pagoda. It was very steep.
The wedding was a wonderful experience. It was really an honor to be included as members of the family in so many intergral parts of the ceremony.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Loc and Hoi's Wedding

The wedding was wonderful. The first day was the Catholic portion, the second day was the traditonal Vietnamese porton. Loc and Hoi included us in the inner circle with their closest family members. It was really an honor to be there.
We left Hoi An at around noon and took a ten dollar car ride the fifteen or so miles to Danang. Along the way we passed Marble Mountain and also the abaondone US Military airport.
It was raining slightly when we got to the hotel. This is the first "non-tourist" hotel we have stayed at. Hoi's father stayed here (they are from near Hanoi). None of the staff spoke English but we managed okay. Around 5 PM a taxi picked us up and took us to the church.
Hoi posed in her western style wedding dress with my mother in her Vietnamese ao dai.
Hoi and Loc practiced their singing and other lines before the ceremony.
Here duing the ceremony they sing their vows.
Here they sign the register along with the witnesses.

They lit one candle to symbolize their union.
After the wedding part was over but during the mass the electricity went off. Candles were swiftly broght in and it gave the rest of the service a romantic feeling.
Hoi and Loc with Hoi's father on the left and her uncle on the right.
Hoi and Loc with his parents.
After the ceremony Hoi and Loc and a friend took my mothr and me out to eat. We thought it was going to be the whole wedding party or at least the rest of his family but it was just the five of us.


Wednesday, October 24, 2007

The Countdown (plus one) is Back On!

Remember a few weeks ago when I got separated from my mother at the Cambodian/Thailand border and ran around in a panic in the sweltering heat? This photo was taken of me after I found her (she had been completely unaware of my angst) and I collapsed.

Anyway that's sort of how I felt yesterday. I don't know if it was a miscommunication, a misunderstanding due to language difficulties, or maybe something was solved at the last minute. Anyway the countdown is back on but add one day--I am scheduled now to pick up Henry on Monday.

But for you folks back in Texas it will still be Sunday night there so you can proceed as before and look for my post on Monday morning your time.

Meanwhile we are packing up from the Hoi An hotel room. A car will take us to Danang at noon. Loc and Hoi's wedding is tonight at 5 in the Catholic Church, and tomorrow will be the banquet and whatever else is planned for the traditonal Vietnamese part.

A Rainy Day in Hoi An's Ancient Town

After hearing indirectly that the G&R was not scheduled for Monday as reported, we were feeling down today, and the weather in Hoi An matched our mood. We left the hotel for a walking tour of Ancient Town--the section of Hoi An nearest the river with buildings that date back to the 14th century. My mother initially wanted to rent a bicycle (for a dollar a day). She tried one out but couldn't get used to hand brakes--she was raised on bicycles with pedal brakes. Here I am on the Japanese Bridge--hundreds of years old but it has been rebuilt several times. It has altars on each end--one is a dog and the other is a monkey altar. This was the farthest point from the hotel we walked and it only took us about ten minutes to get there. Hoi An is quite small.
This is one of the three Chinese congregation halls. Tours were given for a price but we just wandered the streets and did not buy the ticket that allows you in several buildings.
Instead we window shopped--my mother can be seen looking in at a tailor shop. She looked at gongs but did not buy one. I bought a couple of tee shirts and we each bought palm leaf baseball caps. We also bought an outfit for Henry--I hope I get to put it on him soon.
Here we are at the bridge that leads to a small island. Note that the pedestrian and bicycle bridge is equipped with a draw bridge.
This is one of the many tailor shops that are scattered throughout the city. I read that there are over 400. If I needed a suit and was here longer and wasn't so stressed I would have something made.
It rained but didn't exactly pour and we had our umbrellas so it wasn't that unpleasant. The day was interesting as we just walked--and thank goodness we didn't rent those bicycles because it would have been a fiasco trying to get through those narrow streets in a drizzling rain.
I'm still hoping for news about Henry. The entire process is mysterious to me. I read the timeline but it doesn't seem to apply much. But I am tired of waiting and feel that I really need to get to the bottom of whatever is going on and on. I am now against the wall with the USCIS changes--the "grandfathering" concession reportedly will only last until the 17th of November.

A Little Confused

I'm not sure what the time table is now. The last I heard from AII was the 16th, when I was informed that the G&R was scheduled for the 29th and I would pick up Henry on the 28th. Today I found out that might not be the case. However it appears I can still pick up Henry on Sunday as scheduled, but I'm unclear as to whether the G&R will still take place on Monday.

For some positive news, there have been rumblings in the yahoogroups going on since Monday about the new USCIS rule change about when and where the final immigration forms are to be turned in. It seems from what I've been able to gather on my own that they are changing the system so that people turn in the form before they travel rather than in country. The rule was announced this past Monday and was to take effect this coming Monday! Those who are traveling and those who are in country were in a panic. Since then from what I've been able to gather the USCIS has updated its website to say that those who are in country or traveling now will work under the old rules.

Other happy news--I thought I was going to have to wait until Monday to take a FedEx waybil to the consulate in order to send my fingerprints to Washington DC by express shipment. Martin Oppus from the consulate contacted me yesterday, he was on vacation last week when I was getting my fingerprints done (and nobody seemed to know what was going on). He was extremely helpful but said it should be done by express FedEx and the government couldn't pay for that. Anyway last night after I talked to him it dawned on me that I have a FedEx account. Today I called him back and he said they could ship it with my account number to charge it to, so that doesn't have to wait until next Monday and I don't have to race from the FedEx office to the consulate with a waybil.

I'll keep the blog updated. I can't read my own blog or any other blog from http://www.blogspot.com/, but I can post to the blog as it is done through www.blogger.com . Consequently I can't read any comments that people leave so if you want to communicate with me before I get back to Saigon on Saturday you will have to email me.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

My Son Sanctuary

The bus down from Hue passed some really beautiful coastal scenery. We took roughly the same route that the train took. Danang was a really nice city--large enough to be interesting but it wasn't as crowded as Saigon. The road between Danang and Hoi An was scattered with the beginnings of very nice and exclusive looking resort hotels. I think this area is in the works to be the Riviera of the area. It is a convenient short flight from Japan.
We arrieved in Hoi An and were greeted at the bus station by two young men with motorbikes who whisked us off to the Thanh Xuan Hotel. The name of the hotel means Long Life. This is probably the nicest hotel we have stayed in since we have been here.
One interesting thing about the room--there are no outside windows. We could have gotten a room with a balcony overlooking either the city in the front of the garden and pool in the back, but to economize we opted for an interior room with a window overlooking the spiral staircase.
Breakfast was served in the open air restaurant next to the small pool A couple of German tourists jumped in the pool after they ate breakfast. We have more of a choice here for food than we have had at other hotels. Most offer an egg that is cooked omelet style and a baguette with juice and a hot drink. We were offered a menu here and were given a 25000 dong allowance. I ordered a banana pancake with honey and my mother ordered an omelet.

We had planned on having an easy day today, walking around Ancient Town and perhaps renting bicycles and going to China Beach. But mother's friend Phi Mi from Hue called. She is in Danang at university and wanted to come down with her friend Linh. Phi Mi's uncle is the man my mother met on the overnight bus from Hanoi to Hue. He loaned her the cell phone that we have been useing. He left Vietnam in the eighties and has a business in Holland now. They were really nice to my mother in Hue, taking her around town. And it was through them that she met Hoi and Loc, the couple who are getting married at the end of the week.

We asked the girls what they wanted to do, and after consulting with the ladies at the front desk they said they wanted to go to My Son. We had planned on doing that tomorrow but it works just as well to do it today, and it was nice to have locals along to explain and translate.

We hired a van through the hotel. It was a fairly harrowing 60 km drive to My Son. We went through several small villages and past many farming areas. My heart was still in my throat after the driver almost hit a dog when not five minutes later he came within inches of hitting a four year old girl who was trying to cross the road. The poor thing started across without looking and she appeared to be absolutely terrified as the driver barreled down the street with his horn blaring and she zig zagged up and down the road until she finally and luckily turned and ran back the way she came. No parents were in sight.

We arrived safely at My Son. It cost us 60,000 dong each to get in, but Phi Mi and Linh's tickets were only 30,000. There was an exhibit at the front gate with some of the better pieces, I suppose they were moved for their own protection from the elements. But I have read complaints that they should have been left in their natural place. Above is a reconstruction of a Champa temple.
Here are my mother and the girls crossing the bridge to the sanctuary. On the other side a jeep carried us up 1.5 km further to the site. My Son is an old Champa site. They were the people who lived in Vietnam before the present Vietnamese people moved in. The oldest part of the site was construc ted in the 4th century, and I think the latest is around the 12th century. The Champa were defeated and like other indigenous people their culture was basically lost.
The various temples and buildings lie in ruin with lush vegetation surrounding them.
The site is Hindu, with many images of Siva and Ganesha and other Hindu gods.
The weather was really nice, in the low 80's fahrenheit.
Two of the larger temples in the first site had been remodeled into more or less waterproof places to house the better preserved carvings.
The art reminds me of Cambodian carving from the same period, but the cultures are not related.

As we crossed a bridge Linh decided to crawl down into the water and wade around. She seemed to enjoy nature, picking various grasses along the way.
The second site we visited was set in a valley between two beautiful mountain ranges.
I suppose if we had had a guide we might have had a little more appreciation. But there really is little known about the civilization and I had read some. The site is in a very slow renovation stage. At least it is protected and will undergo no further looting or damage.
On the way back I had my camera ready to take photos of the rice paddies.

Luckily we did not come close to hitting any children or anything else. When we got back we went to a small cafe for a bowl of cau lau (I think that is the spelling) which is a Hoi An version of pho. It is made with noodles that are more like pasta and it did not have any broth--just the noodles, some meat, and leafy vegetables. Then the girls went on their motorbike to get us some sugar cane juice and some kind of a pudding made with rice and coconut and what seemed to be potatoes.
When I got back I got a call from a man at the consulate. I have to say he was very helpful and seemed concerned with assisting me in getting my fingerprints expedited. As I suspected the government does not pay for the FedEx shipping that I will need to get it to Washington DC. So I have to arrange to get a FedEx waybil delivered to the consulate in Saigon and it should just take four or five days after they get it. I am trying to get my FedEx information and see if they can send it with my number or I will ask somebody in Saigon to go to FedEx and get the waybil and take it to the consulate. Hopefully it will cause no delays.
I was reading a rumor today about some kind of change in the way the immigration forms are filed here in Vietnam. They say people will file before they leave home. The wait time will be longer but the trip will be shorter if I understand it right. The new plan is supposed to take effect next Monday, but hopefully I will be "grandfathered" in since I'm already here.